As I soon approach 30 years of age, many things start to change, I guess you can’t really call me young much, I wouldn’t at least.

People around you can die sometimes, the more you live the more it happens, it’s kind of inevitable.

Still, I guess I wasn’t able to grow properly, there are certainly many things that I don’t like about myself, and although I don’t really have a problem with them, I also don’t feel like I have had the most usual kind of experiences in life.

Sometimes I think that people are comment as lost as I feel like I am, maybe it’s so I don’t feel that alone, or maybe it’s because I think they’re lying.

Recently I received the news that the sister of my grandma passed away, and although I remember her really fondly, I haven’t found myself crying. It really saddens me that situation, on one hand because I feel like I’m bottling these feelings and on the other hand because I think that I guessed that it was also something inevitable.

She had been fighting with a lot of diseases for a long time, though she was 70 I believe, at that age there’s a point where i guess you start to begin to think about death being closer.

In some bizarre sense I think I ma give death a little too much of my time, it’s not like I want to, it just happens.

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